is a little bitter sweet.
im at a really good point in my life so i have to stop and say thank you Lawd for that. im healthy, im reasonably happy, all that jazz..."so Maya, why are you buggin now?" damn that how ya feel...birthdays are special to me. there was a night i definitely didnt think i would see anything years later let alone the next morning. couple of bags of blood, some solid prayer, and my God...im still here. so to see this day 5 years later doesnt really seem that far back. now calm down, gosh-yes i am GEEKED to be twenty! no longer in the bitchass teens! holla at ya girlgirl lol but every birthday since then ive always had a very vivid bad dream of the night like im getting gunned down in the street, bleeding out in the cold, and no one comes to save me. the first time i ever had that dream, my daddi woke me up right in time, my hero. and all the others i used to wake up with the sounds of gun shots, but last night i stayed sleep until my body ran cold in my dreams. its always interested me the things that go on insde of ppl that no one would ever know if you never experienced them yourself. this is a well kept secret that Lord only knows why i chose to announc my post tramatic issues today. maybe because im starting a new chapter in my life. 20 legally isnt very pivitol but maybe it represents a numerical maturing that needs to be addressed in other aspects of your life, my life. so today...i just grew up. ive been holding on violently to my adolescence, to my youthful mentality, and to my less than responsible activities. while im not doing away with much of anything lol i am making a mental note that today begins the rest of my life and that by the time i drop my own {10 KIDDOS} =nigga please= ill be able to look back on the years and know did something worth while, that i lived for a reason.
life is as delicate a a whisper, spoken too loudly youve ruined the sacredness, when not given enough projection, you missed out on the chance.
be happy for this moment, this moment is your life.
...AND...
big-huge-MEGA UPS ta the {{BESTFRIEND}} for the first cake day call, the best wall post, and definitely the sweetest twitter! he's the battery to my car, the black for my berry, and the touch to my ipod. =) love you Martin. we'll do it big when you get back. -no pun- unless you pull out that blue box...Nigga (((ALL PUN))) lmao
-Corretta.
xoxo
"its my birtdhay so you know im bout riiiiiide out! its teh best day of the year boy!"
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