Tuesday, September 30, 2008

ugh!

ok look, i wanta go to sleep. today the world wins, i quit! im too womanly for this fuckery, scratch that, these shenanigans. Le is notorious, ya hear me notorious for keeping me up when im sleepy.
there's ppl that really make you happy but you never realized it until you find yourself thinking of them. im thinking of someone and while def brings about a smile i wonder if i crossed his mind...
would you like a ticket to paradise, to an island get away, a cure for all your ailments? ya you would! its too legit
dori and frank drug me to cafe coco and im so happy they did because jamie lynn performed and it was beautiful, dammit beautiful-scratch that, amazingly beautiful
sometimes we all call our parents and its hilarious kuz Le turns into a 5 yr old (baby voice) i ate crackers and went to orchestra, my tummy hurts, and i ate a sloppy joe, why do they call 'em sloppy joe's? who is joe, daddy?
excuse me while i shake the dog shyt, scratch that, the hell outta her :-)
i need a hug
i need a mutha....loving nap. i caught that one.
i heard love is in the air....he he he
too bad it doesnt live here no more lol
i should most def be studying for this spanish test i have tomorrow....but im not.
-xo-
man it was a shyt load, scratch that a bus load of awkward turtles in cafe coco today...
man Swag is gon be hott shyt, stay tuned.
i blog because i cnt express half the things i feel. but i feel more things than i can write.
new fav quotes: "sleep outside, the devil is in your house" "my ass is an illusion...in the jeans its so-so but out?...oh baby ass! (i can curse there because its a direct quote, ha!)" "im special- gotta claim it; im special!" "lets get caught in the rain and lose our grip on everything" "many rivers think theyre oceans, many puddles think theyre streams. if i was you i seize the moment and dnt let go of me" "PENIS" (the last is a dorian townsend original)
i slick might make those into something poetic. minus the "penis" (no pun)
dorian just be talkin! like just runnin' her damn mouth, scratch that, her big mouth is so hilarious
please dnt pet the dori!
i got shyt, scratch that stuff to do. man ima blow this no cursing bullshyt, scratch that cursing habit outta the water!!!!

tuesday morning rambling

im in world history, im not die hard fond of world history i prefer american or africana but anywho, my profeesor, dr corse, is hilarious. he just gave us the history of Nike! who knew?! i most def didnt. but anywho here's a semi point.blank.period.
i woke in a bad mood, probably because i went to sleep in a bad mood, tossed and turned, and woke up to rain. waking up to rain makes me wanta stay in bed all day make up dreams , dream them, and do it all over again.
yesterday was a good day, fun, yummy, and chill. i fucks, scratch that, i mess with Cuervo! my father collects alcohol and he taught me a little about each one, while i havnt retained much, i still like the taste of them. cuervo goes hard, i see why danny buckles him in the back seat. lol.
im readjusting my focus. i really wanta do well in all the things i touch. so im putting a lot of focus in skool, seeing as how God has fixed all my financial aid issues (amen!) im finally on my feet, this entertainment group is really taking shape and im excited to really put in work and pull out some dope ass, scratch that, just dope events. i hav other things planned so we'll see what i can do about those...
ok let me say this, i met a guy this summer. cool ass, scratch that, cool dude. very focused, driven, confident, handsome, just all around on his shyt, scratch that, on his business. in light of being back in skool. he has become crazy busy! like if i was that busy i would probably sleep. ya, if im under too much and everything is requiring my presence id go to sleep. thats why i dnt pledge my loyalty to more things than i can do well. he, on the other hand, might actually be superman. i have to give the kid his props, if you can be everywhere and do everything, kudos to you boo. but i have to admit that i do at times feel like, being a woman of course, did you forget about me? but you know, honestly of course, im proud of him, of all of friends, theyre all really spreading their wings and doing a lot and i wish them more than well. but... question: is anyone proud of me? im always the "Go Baby" friend but i dnt always get that in return. its a struggle to always lend support and never receive it. so thank you Dori, Frankie, Le, and of course bestfriend for always "Go Baby"-ing me :-)
i really miss my mom. its not about seeing her, ive been so busy with skool and Swaghouse that i dnt get to call her like i used to. and it really does break my heart when she calls me wondering if im just ok. like thats the most genuine love i know, she just wants to make sure my day is ok, that im alive, to let me know she was thinking of me. even though she has recently become a full time nurse and secretary for my stepdad she still finds time for the things she loves. making time for the things that matter. im honestly going to start working on that because there really is no reason to neglect things if i say they matter, ima do better about juggling my time. im going to make her proud; i can and i will.
im 'bout ta startcrankin on these hoes! scratch that, these under achievers. see, i can stop cursing

Monday, September 29, 2008

the irony

daily, probably more than once a day, i check our blogs (Dori, Le, Frankie, and The Crayonz) and it appeared to me this reoccurring theme of half ass saying whats on our mind and how we feel. im not saying we hold back or water down the truth, but in light of recent events ive noticed that we dnt say names, we semi walk around the major issues, and a lot of the time we dnt even say it. is it because we're afraid of what ppl would say? our own repercussions for admitting the truth? are we shy? ashamed? i think some of it is about propriety, you cnt just say what ever walks into your head, a lot ppl wouldnt like me anymore... oh well. there is a shyt load of stuff to say in my head and i never do, i think thats true for all of us. this interests me because we all agreed that these blogs are personal property and that whomever should so read it cnt actually be offended. i guess im saying all that to say this...these blogs will never truly be ours. we have published our souls in a sense, releasing it to the public for analysis, criticism, and rebuke. and i gotta admit sometimes when random ppl bring up this blog i feel like im naked in front of a crowd. its a rush tho, to know i just said that to the world, THE WORLD! like anyone who googles me or anything close enough to me will find this, find me, uncensored and honest. wow....thats kinda got me buggin. but really,the majority of "worth while" posts are the effects of other ppl, the sweet things theyve said, the heartache for the things they didnt or even did, whatever they do that effects us we capture the moment and post it for the world. thus, they kind of become the property of those who have given us some mild revelation. thats slick bogus. i think ima start writing in my blog. i used to be a rather talented writer idk if i still have it tho. we'll see i guess. the irony, i write almost every day, but i have yet to really write. as if to say i am alive every day but ive yet to live. i started this blog for me, but ive pretty much dedicated it to you. as if to say im handing you me via email. we all have, in some way, shape, or form, dedicated our blogs, for the most part, to the memorial of one person, their events, our thoughts of them, and their screw up's and ours. i guess we all have our mr. monotony in a way. i just kinda wonder when will all of this, all the silly things we write, all the vivid imagery we weave, when will we wrap in the blanket? when do we stop existing and live? when do we stop writing and finally read the book? i guess there are still chapters to develop, still moments to capture, still blogs to post...

Sunday, September 28, 2008

buggin!


today slick sucked. between stupid ppl and their stupid drama, no church, Le not feeling well, Le leaving, dumb ass espanol, and me just buggin this day just sucked. i really wish frankie was back. this week has got to be better than this weekend kuz this weekend dear Jesus this weekend slick f'in sucked! im still buggin, uhg!!!!

allow me to reintrodue myself


-im not one for inheritting beef, but if there are consistently issues and strifes between you and my best friends then no i dnt want anything to do with you. i dnt take sides but i defend mine.

-if you outwardly call yourself a Christian and frequently speak about your awesome relationship with God, then there should be no reason for anyone else to see flaws in it. your walk should be speak volumes but if you are sonstantly contradicting your walk by complaining, gossiping, keeping up mess, etc then yes ppl will call you out on it.

-check it, these blogs are the property of the one writing it. we have all written disclaimers to let the readers know. thus, you can neither be offened or mad at anything said here. given, if its about you and figure out its about you OH FUCKIN WELL! this is like a journal true anyone and everyone can read it, but its still considered snooping if you go read it to find out my perspective in a situation. i honestly could care less if anyone gets mad off this blog, i will be more than happy to explain or elaborate but no i wnt take it down or censor what i write in the furture.

-if you got beef, tension, issues, or whatever you need to come to me first! If that doesnt seem like something you can handle (coming to me) then keep my name out of your mouth. nobody liikes a shit disturber, if your runnin' to everyone and lettiing us catch the whiplash fuck no we're not gonna suck ass to fix shyt with you, thats just human nature. if im wrong, i will apologize. if i feel tension on my end then yes ill bring it to. otherwise, i keep it moving.

-ive almost lost my life. i have no time or patience for frivilous activities, i make a conscious effort to surround myself with positive worthwhile ppl, and if ridiculous beef should occur i let it roll off my back and kep high stepping.

-i can honestly say it amuses me when ppl get upset that i dnt speak to them. slick strokes my ego, like ive hurt your feelings by not gracing you with my greeting (lol na that was cocky i dnt really feel like that) but honestly i think that everyone needs ot be confident enough in themselves that regardless of the doings of others you should be unmoved, unstirred, and concrete in you.

-ay, get over it. real talk, there is more than enough stupidity in this world, we can do without yours.

-i love me. and i will be doing me regardless of you, her, him, or anyone one or thing that has an issue ill be consistently doing me.

-stand on a chair. have a friend stand on the floor beside you. now try to pull them up to your level, they cnt just step up. its rather hard isnt it? they pulled you down didnt you. lesson learned, its a lot easier to be pulled down. its lonely at the top.

-my name is Maya. hello. i takes no bullshyt, i keep it 100 like vodka, and i dnt kiss ass. i love God, and i dnt need to brodcast my walk because me and Him know what ive come thru.

-please submit all questions and concerned in writing. otherwise raise your hand before you speak some dumb shyt.


-Maya Badass Matthews
Teddy Geiger- For You I Will
Wondering the streets,
in a world underneath it all
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet
As what I can't have
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair 'round your finger
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you
What I feel about you.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
and cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I willFor you I will
Forgive me if I stutter
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways a thousand times,
no more camouflage
I want to be exposed,
and not be afraid to fall.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you
If I could dim the lights in the mall
And create a mood I would
Shout out your name so it echos in every room
I would
That's what I'd do, That's what I'd do to get through to you
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
this song is so simply eloquent. no ribbons in the sky, no make love til the morning comes, just honesty. ima stutter trying to tell you how i feel but im gonna muster, gather, grope for every ounce of confidence i have because youre important to me; for you ill set aside all my apprehensions and fears and tell you how i feel. for you, as if to say that youre the only person that could merit such a personal stretch for me. the only person that makes me wanta reach out, bust down this box and make f'in origami, but just for you. thats so damn sweet to me, geez.
i just watched the notebook with the girls and that movie is so damn unrealistic. get dimentia and see if yo spouse doesnt drop yo ass in a home and bust a move on yo ass. maybe thats slightly pessimistic but ive never seen such love in ppl. but this song makes me think that maybe ppl do love and even if its not "notebook love" maybe its like riding a bike with your hands in the air like its just good to be alive. i rode back to skool with the window down, resting my head out the window and i imagined that this might be the feeling of flying, until my contact got dry-whamp whamp. but i think thats life, the little moments of bliss and then a smack in the face to bring you back down. you have to be happy in the moment, the moments become your life. that was slick deep. ya dig?

funny funny


bestfriend just called me and the kidd is fucked! that nigga is so drunk. the band is still in ATL and plez be advised THEM NIGGAS IS CUTTIN A CLEAN CLOWN! he talkin bout ihop and mixing silver and gold. i swear i love him, he is sooo f'in funny. that slick just made my night. thanks bestfriend, thats why i ♥ you, kiddo. peep the pic, its one of my fav's!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

bruh i slick disappeared

so i been gon, kidnapped, sleep face muthafuckin down, and i aint even been by ta show the love lets recap some dope moments. this might be semi point.blank.period. but stay with me.

reggie swann aka bestfriend has become a regular in 608. i like that live doesnt seem to mind but he really doesnt have anything to worry about.

we went to church sunday and God definitely delivered a word to me. He'll bless you in spite of.

dorian townsend is officially inducted into the clique. from this day forward plez refer to her as Storm.

Le is a mac. 'nuff said. the coach is back.

we've learned a valuable lesson, dnt put your emotions into a fb status for the world see. you cnt legitimately be mad at someone else's status. and live gives great advice once again whoopty whoop.

Grey's Anatomy is back! Bestfriend and I are watching it together in 527 every thursday because we're a muthafuckin team!

Rock band is our official game!

we have stayed up all night every night all week, no sleep. and we still cut the hell up all week!

im running out of lotion, rapidly. the ash will soon overcome me.

israel nellis likes my roomie, then again who doesnt like my roomie.

an ex showed up and confessed his unwavering love for me and all of asked me to be his girlfriend, uhm no. sorry. not really sorry but im polite.

oh, me and Dori took Austin and Troy to walmart! f'in hilarious. MAGNUMS!

dori makes me say bad words.

praise God, my stepdad is doing way better. but his family is a bunch of whining ass hoochies. i wanted to bitch slap somebody.

petty hoes need a swift kick in the face. dnt ever let me catch yo triflin ass with my name in yo mouth again or will disinfect the fuck outta your face! try me.

ima really stop cussing...tomorrow. unless somebody commits some fuckery and it needs to be addressed.

i wanta kiss you, there i said. dnt bring it up again.

we watch a lot of disney movies-correction, we watch of fuckin' MULAN! geez frankie, give a rest its a damn tape.

ugh! im cussing. shyt-ooh, i mean.... shoot

i change jeans entirely too much

Le has allergies and she's sniffling, but she sniffles like a child every 5 seconds and ima rip that little nose off her face. mostly for her relief but partially for my nerves :-)

i ♥ country muzik.

this week has been a dope ass...oh just dope week. see, thats some bullshyt, with some cussing the whole sentence loses its sense of importance. i mean really who decided certain words were curse words anyway?! dori says that some nigga was sitting around bored and pulled some random words outta his ass and decided these would be inappropriate words. thats wack as shyt

Le calls us asses. ass 1 ass 2 ass 3. so me and dorian decided to make it official. im the rude ass, dori is the bitch ass, frankie is moody ass, and Le is the hott ass(like fast hott not pretty hot, all bad)

ugh im cussing! shyt-i mean...shoot

Le has terrible aim, she frequenty throws things waaaaayyyy too slow to be effective.

im fuckin cougar bruh! really my nerves are just bad. but im tall so im a giraffe and a cougar so im a gi-ougar.

Le wants me to kick her ass

Dori is an awesome nose blower

i cnt blow my nose

and Le's nose is leaking

youll notice there's not much in here about Frankie because she deserted us for that boi and sleep! no bueno.

hey do me a favor, if you read my blog shoot me a text i wanta know who reads this. if you dnt hav my number hit me up on facebook or something

"i can hear everything i have musical ears" well can you hear dog whistles and this FUCK OFF!

ugh cussing. oh well, oh f'in well!

Monday, September 22, 2008

my life is better

because dori t just sang me a song ALL RHYMING WITH MAYA for example papaya, fiya (fire) crya (crier)
because me Le and Frankie rode in the back of Josh's truck today
because "youre straight bruh?!""im straight bruh!"
because of frankie period
because of dori t period
because ive found my long lost twin period
because reggie aka bestfriend, yes thats one word, frequently visits 608 to make my day
because dori is rearranging furniture very slowly
because Le just tripped!
because there are 5 instuments in this ittybitty ass room
because Le knocked over everything on dori's desk with that guitar
because Le keeps me from doing anything constructive
because i cant stop giggling
because "
God shall smolt those who judge 3 times!" "and you need ta read yo Bible!"
because dori keeps singing song to me while playing guitar with one hand
because "you just raped me" "RAPED!"
because her titi's are the same size as two balled up Leandria's
because the lamp in dori's room gives me a headache
because i found my swag! it was in the ben with my shoes
because i just "boosie faded you"
because Frankie can help you curse out anybody, Dori will show you the ways of the bitch, I give the best advice, and Le is just cute and thought provoking.
because we have such great convo's in the middle of the night and because she wakes up so happy
because my toes are pink!
because Le is playing the Rugrat theme song
because of the "ooh ooh oooh"
because of the "oh yeah oh yeah OH YEAH"
because i decided last night that i will be everything i ever wanted to be because i can and i will because i want you to be proud of me the way im proud of you.
because im the happiest ive been in a good little while
my life is better because youre in my life.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

multitasking for real!


so im having a convo with dori (right the face said it best!) and we're just chatting away about the infamous mr. monotony. its so funny to me because me and him are so close. but it has me all of blushing to hear her cute little descriptions of why she likes him. so of course we all notice ppl for different reasons, but who woulda thought it was his SHOES! like what a dammit is that! (fyi "dammit" is short for "dammit adorable" which are just cute little moments) but as im explaining how cool he is, down to earth, and easy to talk to im also talking to Le. she's riding home from Chi-town with a photographer who is actually a relationship counselor! (echo counselor-counselor-counselor!) and she sends me a text and all it says is dnt lower your standards. the guy told her this and it was so fitting for the convo we were having. dori and i are so shallowly discussing how hott our little crushes are but honestly take a look at the individual you call yourself liking, crushing, stalking (idk how yall get down lol) but is he really up to par? are you dropping the bar so he can look more appealing. i must say, honestly, i think he's a above my normal standards. causing me to really geet out of my comfort zone and put myself out more. i think if it were a negative change my stubbornness would have called it to my attention. i used to have a thing for bad boiz, boiz with tatts and dreds, thugs but he'e such a good guy, focused, clean cut, no tatts, and he loves muzik, old skool rap, and even though he's a Nas fan and im die hard Jay-Z i think with a solid mixed cd ill convert him. my parents would love him! (lol) back to you dori, he's a good guy, trust me. i will say that just from knowing him he does like forward girls. now if thats too much of a stretch pull out, admire from a far, and keep your heart neatly tucked away. it hink though that good relationships require both of you to step outside your established box. -interjection, im sorry, im also getting my hair twisted right now ad she sneezed all on the side of my face!!! i wanta gag! and im really trying to figure out if the light in this junt keeping blinking or im trippin there they go again! (moment of silence) ...aight im back...- coincidentally im also having a chat with frankie! and of course "Saxy" has blown her day as usual. but with one swift convo, a few key words, and their off too Rusans for sushi and margaritas. it is rather amusing to me the power we allow our guys to have. and i really wonder if they even know what they do to us?! one word and we're crushed! one word and we're high! cracked out high! and what do we give them...????(im actually asking kuz i really wanta know. do you smile when we call, show all your friends, and then quickly wipe away the smile and put on your bored voice so we dnt know how ecited we just were, ya well we do!) im doing ALL of this AND watching Why Did I Get Married. needless to say, im just bubbling with love advice, emotions, and words. so that movie just went off and im now lisening to 112, the kiing of male love songs, writing this to the world, a gift. so here ya go...


p.s. georgia is beating arizona! YAYY!!!! i love football!

Friday, September 19, 2008

well i put up a good fight...

in my life I've faced my fair share of adversity. but it just really confuses me, frustrates, and upsets me that the worst of things happens to good ppl. and then I find myself questioning God and His purpose for my life. why would I, of all ppl get shot?! why would I, of all people, get jumped?! like really, why my stepdad, of all the men, get lung cancer?! it always seems to be something seems like.
he went in for surgery monday to get a spot removed and they ran their little tests and told us he's got cancer. my mom called and told me and I was just shocked. "not cancer" I thought. and all week I've been keeping myself busy, preoccupied just so I wouldn't have to admit the apparent, this could be bad. i ve been putting off going to the hospital all week because I cnt stand to see him wired up, beeping like that but when I walked in the hospital today it all rushed me and I realized its time to pray. and it breaks my heart that bad things always happen to good ppl. I used ta date a guy who told me "there's no good ppl, just ppl trying to do good things" he can be so pessimistic sometimes it gets on my damn nerves. sorry that was an ADD moment (Le!) but ya...I've been praying but I know I can do better so here goes:
God,
thank you for this day, the opportunity, and this reasonable portion of health; you didn't have to do it, any of it. I come before you as humbly as I know how and this is my prayer. Heal him. I've seen the things you can do, mostly because I've seen you do them for me. let your power fall like rain, Father. in anyway you see so fit, bless him. there is no medicine like You and I'm asking for a dose. if not Lord, if this is his time then please dnt let him suffer and struggle. give him peace of mind and call him home. either way you have it ill praise you inspite of the pain. please God, please. I love You, I thank You.
amen
someone told me once that if you write your prayers and read them back it solidifies the prayers and especially if share your prayers so if that's true this prayer should be concrete being that I've read this whole thing 3 times and now the WORLD can too.
- ♥

Thursday, September 18, 2008

with that said...


ok so since i posted the last blog, a little glimpse into the average male mouth, i thought it would be appropriate to account for the female mind. now, before i just rip this let me say

i am not the average female. im not inclined to a lot of crying, nagging, and whooplah. im very passionate and yes rather emotional but if you leave me to my emotions i can get over it and let it go.
thats my disclaimer. im writing this on behalf of the average woman so that you, nigga, might know what we think.

you think logically we think emotionally. if it hurts our feelings or leaves us in a feeling of unrest we tend to dwell on it. we dnt mean to nag but we need resolution and until we find peace of mind no one will find peace of mind.

we dnt mean to be this emotional but we cnt help it, we're women. and once the emotions top off we cry. lets talk about crying, there are several different cries, stay with me here. the "infront of yo dude cry" this has a few little tears, a lot of sniffling, some careful-dnt-smudge-the-eyeliner- eye wipes and in some way or form, "i just dnt understand". "the angry cry" this one has a lot of cursing, huffing and puffing, and in some way or so many words "omg i hate crying over his ass!" the "honest cry" when youve actually done something wrong to upset us and our heart hurts and we cry. involves a lot of tissues because we were prepared, a sad movie, and a pillow to hold and of course "idk why i ever loved him". "THE cry" this is the oh shyt real for real cry. the cry when you cnt do anything but cry and cry hard. when youve tried for a long time to hold it back and work it out. this one is a doozie...deep cries, coughing, snot. this is an ugly cry that i-dnt-give-a-fuck-ima-cry cry, trust its all bad quote, "oh God". if you can get us to that cry youve fucked up.

now when youve fucked up and we get togther...oh baby, when we get together. this is some men bashing! some slash some tires, fuck that nigga! this is how cars get messed up, eggs get thrown, and feelings get hurt. fyi, a few women in a room, talking about guys, and especially if one or more is at all upset is called a RIOT! hence "backbone" (www.simplyeccentricity.blogspot.com read at your own risk)

we over analyze and deeply scrutinize. whatever you say. we can add so much more to every word you say. you say "ill call you back in 20 min" we say "the hell is he doing that take 20 minutes?! this nigga spittin game ta some hoe or some bullshyt! fuck his ass". you say "i dnt wanta talk about it" (as in there's nothing more to say lets not fight about the same shyt) we heard shut the fuck up stop stop naggin me bout the same shyt we been done discussed. you say "i dnt feel like pleasing anybody today" (as in, im tired. ive been doing so much for everybody else i just want some me time) we hear i dnt give a fuck what you want ima do me. ladies, ladies, ladies stop nit picking them, they didnt mean nearly the way we took it.

so men, i think, maybe just a little bit, i get it now. the simpicity behind guys is enormous and the complexity, which is women, is a never ending journey, with loop hole, pot holes, sink holes, quick sand. like trust me, we can be a trip! pack for the journey... i dnt mean to scare you but realize this. now, when you meet the one (echo the one-one-one) yall will fit, compliment each other, and things will be slightly less complex because off both of you will be willing to let go of your ways to stick it out. but until you find her or he finds you...this shyt can be a trip.

the shyt niggas say

so im sitting at spence-n-lloyd's right with a whole damn house full of niggas so i felt obliged to let yall know what the hell real dudes talk about. obviously the orginal convo stopped when i should up here's a list of the topic:
-the sophisticated ladies-esp the one with tha dookdook! you gottsa do the "oo" for the imagery of the big booty
-the way the dude on the super d's flyer has a suit the same color as the words
-the hoes at vandy "put her number in my phone"
-the infamous Adam, their roommate, with his back hair and chest hair perm. apparemtly he is part warewolf
-"damn that nigga 8'11 he's almost 9 feet tall," lloyd "DUH!," all
-homegirl that tried ta kill herself at state "she shoulda jumped on somethin harder ol i wanta die soft lookin ass"
-so apparently vince young tried ta commit suicide, idk..."he shoulda done it"
-and of course niggas and relationships
im sayin tho, thi s is real nigga talk. its really very honest, quite hilarious, and of course 100% nigga-ish!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

when in doubt blog it out

so i got back to my room today i was like ya ima write a blog. problem, i dnt really have anything to say...well, thats a lie i have one major statement but i wouldnt dare say that to the world. my little secret.
i slick have a test tomorrow and havnt touched jack shyt for it, ill handle it tho.
i really wanted Ru Sans but we went to Qdoba instead, it was cool.
ppl that work in customer service and are rude need to be bitch slappes, nigga its CUSTOMER SERVICE, if you didnt wanta be taking orders all day ya ass shoulda went to college.
i gues this is like a semi point.blank.period.
ok so i left this window open when we left to go with dori t and chris coleman
hella laughter
arby's has tis new orange cream shake shyt but its got like fucking pudding swirls all in it
i dnt like pudding
or peas or peaches
but i do like...LOL! dori! so no, its not a "p" thing
le is a pimp!
but she cant skip...all bad
we went to target and i sang my little heart out!
dori t got a hair cut-hott shyt
apparently lloyd doesnt like his song...well damn.
its a polo and pearls week. keep up.
pandora.com is the muthaf'in shyt!
so my cussing detox is off to a rough start...dnt judge me!
aight i got homework and i smell like hott arby's food-yucky!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

venom!

eric kelly brought us ice cream!
-nough said

point.blank.period

im almost better
im getting "it" back, Le knows what i mean
frankie caught the spencerglover-itis
i really hate this geography class. he just runs his damn mouth about jack shyt
i should stop cursing....tomorrow
ike got gas on that bullshyt!
that dude in my geo class, me and my homegirl megan we be harassing him lol
my geo teacher just called my ass out! damn bruh...
he called marriage a death sentence this nigga might be bitter
im hungry
my friend armond hit me up on aim last night great convo. ♥ to that kidd
tell me why this dude in my class, another guy, is eating a bagel and strawberry cream AND funions-NIGGA! funions? and cream cheese? the fuckery
i want more tattoos
i wanta pierce my ears
i need a damn job!
girls really like goodnight and good morning texts cough-Le-cough
we had a visit last night from eric kelly, too fun
he is officailly to be called venom from now on
we named that damn giraffe Le is always throwing at me, Eric.
marcelis is drawing us an Oscar for our trashcan whose name just happens to be Oscar
now that Waldo, the sunflower, has gon on to be with Jesus we have an extra cup
Micah, our RA is muthaf'in hoot
ill bust the windows out yo car-dope ass song
spence put me on to the silver and gold by t pain-hott
i wanta go to ATL
my point.blank.period. often becomes a list of things i want
man, i saw this asian girl this morning, she was fucking dope
i wanta be asian if i wasnt black
like asian is the new black, i read that on a t-shirt i think
she had on dunks and scarf and this hott ass backpack
ya im jockin, no homo
i miss my puppy...
moment of silence for waldo and my puppy, karma
dunkyn needs a bath, my trunk still says b.live
chuck*love
pillow talk
frankie wrote a blog and slick called out all of nigga's bitchassness-f'in hilarious
see, im working on not cursing
;-)
i ♥ this picture. its my keep the niggas off pose lmao

Monday, September 15, 2008

rules of the game

(this is aleesa my bff!)

play the game. off top kidds, its all a game. either play or get played, ya dig?

these are the rules...
1. play-not in the sense of "playa"-playin. like be honest about where your relationship, or whatever yall happen ta be calling it, is at. never cut the team loose until you reach monogomy. let him run point but dnt bench tha squad. im not one for passing out the cooch by any means but we all need entertainment.
2. girls get serious way before guys even consider the option. pull back sweethearts. you might feel like yall are one way- he's probably not.

3. guys think yall have talked every day while girls know we havent talked for 27 hours 43 minutes and 25, 26, 27 seconds. exaggerating but still. every day convo is not a major staple for talking relationships. let him miss you.
4. dnt listen to excessive amounts of love songs. it'll fill your head and heart with silly ideas.
5. stop daydreaming. he'll never be the guy you've pieced together in you mind. and when he doesnt meet these outlandish expectations youll be the one crushed. well what did you expect silly girl?
6. he's a man. he'll fail every test you put him to. yes, every test.

7. speak up. if you wanta see him, say so. girl, i promise you, somebody else will. and they'll be a a hell of a lot more agressive than us good girls. dnt let goin ass hoes get ya man.
8. boys can invest oodles of time and never feel anything. strange, i know, i but its true. you need to learn to read yo dude. dnt let your feelings cloud your judgement. just because yall happen to spend a lot of time, make sure its for the right reason. ppl arent always on the same page.
9. dnt compare your relationships with your friends or even just ppl you see. things are never as they seem and a lot more goes on behind closed doors than you can see from the outside looking in. be true to yours and leave the world to do whatever it does best.
10. (this is my fav) if youre takin care of yours, he should never have to look elsewhere. and vice versa. you gotta do whatever it takes to keep her happy, within reason of course, but whaever none the less so she wnt be looking else where for a thrill. ladies, hold him down, give him a reason to come home and he'll always bring it all back to you.

these are my little words of wisdom. my homegirl had a convo with my friend and this was a lot of their discussion. i thought you might be able to apply it to you and yours and move forward. good luck...

-xo-

bad news

so my "step father" quotes because its nit official. they were planning to get married this summer but postponed that to buy a house. watevr, that's beside the pt.
he has lung cancer. he just came outta surgery to remove a suspicious spot and they know now its cancer. he's waking up to find out he's in worse shape than he went to sleep. I just wanta collapse, like how could this be?...
idk this all bad.
AND tsu has lost over 9000 students personal info including social security numbers. like nigga my social?! the fuckery

the fuckery (this really has nothing to do with me)

in the rear view mirror it all looked liked harmless fun but thats why there's that little disclaimer written in "objects are never what the hell they seem" and it wasnt until she got from rear view to my real view that i realized, "oh shyt". and in the house it all seemed like good healthy flirtation but it wasnt until she walked in and we all looked at each other like "oh shyt" and then i read the blogs, yes blogs that's when i realized "oh shyt"
niggas man niggas...
idk why yall gotta do us like you do...we're good girls, the kinda girls youll regret losing, the kinda girls that you take home ta meet ya moms and get busy in the bathroom for kicks,the kinda girls that stand by their man thru thick and thin, but no yall wanta cut a fuckin clown! dnt be surprised when we cut ya assz loose and the next time ya see us it seems ta be raining men. there is always somebody who wants ta play on our teams, dnt get benched homeboiz.

and you wnt even realize until we put it in ya face and call you all sorts of shyt. but its true and sometimes we just need ta say that some niggas aint shyt.


she said it not me...

its real tho. read at your own risk.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

footprints

its at your lowest, your weakest, your most insane that God will give you the strength to do all the things, the things you never knew you could even muster. the things we've been through, the cards we've been dealt, all by chance. the past can shape us but take hold of this day and mold the person you will be. forgive, its a lot easier said than done. a journey to understanding, take your time and get down to the heart of the matter. bur realize you will never be forgiven until you forgive... i will intercede on your behalf, for your soul's sake. the burden that you bear is unbearable, the heart you have is unmendable, but the love you have can undo all wrong and heal are harm. im here when you need me, im here when you dnt. friendship, there will never be no greater love. these are the times when there will be only set of footprints in the sand. ill carry you on, He'll carry you on.
-xo-

late night convo

they say that a drunk mind tells sober thoughts and if that's the case then we have a lot to catch up on...

Frankie and Le are on their way back to me. I definitely missed my comrades! see ya soon ladies.

travel mercies please God. bring all my loved ones back the way they left. amen...

Saturday, September 13, 2008

fake bro




i really hate bitchz, hatin ass, ratchet ass bitchz. i especially hate the kinda hoes that be like "im the realest bitch in the room and if i got somethin ta say ill say it ta yo face" and then they ass write a fuckin facebook message or some honesty box bullshyt! if you got somethin ta say about me, around me, or to me; if im the topic, if im mentioned....well bitch come see about me! call me or better yet knock on my muthafuckin door! you must know where i live you watchin me this damn close! jockin ass bitch. dnt be mad im more stuntastic,way more fly, and that i dnt give a fuck about you. you ridin me more than ya man dikin' ass slut. take notes, im the model of the best!
xoxo

Friday, September 12, 2008

epiphany


music is the only thing that can enter us without permission, consume us against our will, and provoke the thoughts we have struggled to suppress. she was listening to india arie's i am ready for love. and you were the only person that came to her mind because you love music and art, respect the spirit world, but you wnt listen to your heart. do you care? i know you do. i know you do because of your feeble attempt to "do whats best" well i think we need to talk and address this fuckery. stop lying to yourself and admit that you feel what she feels because she's feeling it enough for both of you...and she'll do what best for you.

ok as for you (someone else, yall gotta stay with me here) you really have no idea what you want and thats ok...life's a bitch if it was easy it'd a slut...get it? but really trust yourself. i know youre comfortable with someone because yall have been there before but yall have also been low before and sad before and bad before. i see how happy he makes you but ive seen him crush you too. you wear you heart on your mismatched sleeves, vulnerable but honest. he (a different he) sees your flaws and your insecurities and he knows that you still have his sweater and that there's no place else he'd have it be. get it?

and i even get it now...he's (yes, yet another he)he's not fuckin up. im just kinda hoping he will so my logical-self can tell my hopeful-self "i told ya so. theyre all the same..." because we all know my ridiculous obsession with romance and love whamp whamp but no one is The Notebook, Brown Sugar, or Love Jones. i think that boiz are blind and girls are 20/20 neither one is really better. boiz will over look any and everything and never know they missed it-fail. but we see it all, even the stuff that isnt there, we add more to things and blow the smallest of shyt outta proportion. there's gotta be a soft spot somewhere in the middle, right? there is. stop nit picking, let go, get over it. he probably didnt even know he messed up anyway. and guys pay attention, take a good look at what's in your face and appreciate the gifts you have.

girls like us, the girls mentioned in this post, we're good girls. the kind of girls you'll regret losing. boiz, boiz like the ones mentioned in this post are stupid, hard headed, and stubborn, but theyre awesome and definitely worth the time. start the clock...

point.blank.period









rippin it on ya ass!





my nose hurts. its so little and its hard to blow and it just hurts.


i wish i didnt miss you because i doubt youre missing me


we woke up at 10:04 today and we both have 10:20's-all bad.


leandria snapped last night! F tha band kidds! and all the jockin ass hoes! they get in the way of her and her band kidd. i was like wow b.live was like huh and everyone within earshot was like she's going thru something...


when i get in the mood i was in last night i need some hard core cussin sinful muzik-hello weezy


when im feeling like i do today i need some gospel...thank you leandria.


i gave that bagel the bizznass.


my ex is coming in town for a doctor's appt and has requested my presence. "i just havnt seen you and wanted you ta come to the doctor with me you know i hate the doctor" ill see what i can do...


i skipped black lit today im not doin this damn slave call assignment-count me absent see if i care


whenever i wear chucks he's on my mind i wear chucks a lot...geeez go away!


whenever me and Le are being mean to each other something always happens. computers die, one of us falls, stubs a toe, or hits an elbow. thats God saying play nice girls


le changed clothes 3 times this morning and her butt hurts and that's what she gets! ha!


whamp whamp


estelle sings american boy and adele is someone completely different. most def made an ass out of myself earlier.


hola! i speak spanish


im going home for the weekend, i need to see my ma. seek counsel. be loved forreal.


"you gon eat these nuggets hoe!"


did i mention i gave that bagel the bizznass


we have a dance that we slick stole from lloyd it goes to the "ooww ooww" in american boi and the "gu-cci" in gucci bandana. its fly


number "sisty ate" is my fav. he told me ill make a great house wife because i look cute sitting on a dryer. thanks, i guess....


i want a brand new fall attire


leandria is a PIMP that girl gets more play than the damn NFL!


ja-ja-jealous


fake bro! i miss Reg, he always makes my day. ♥ you best friend.


that was a fake ass hug last night fyi.


my little boi needs a bath, aka my car.


yes, he's a boi. i dnt ride girls.


-cough-


-sniffle-


-sneeze-


landria is going to memphis with dori t and frankie and im staying here...ill miss them like a fat kidd misses cake. travel mercies....


leandria always makes my bed! and when i come in im like wait....something's different....oh. gosh Le thanks kidd!


i have a thinking cap that doubles as my driving hat and triples as my anytime hat.

i have a new fav song. hello by william davenport


my nose hurts...ugh.


my freshman, jordan, sits in front of me in spanish and being that i was late when i walked by him he said i looked cute and then he turned around and told me i have pretty, dark eyes. to which i repied, "youre such a flirt. thanks kidd"


fuckery! love that word

aight, im gone. deuces. hope your day is better than mine. well damn that was pessimistic, sorry.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

laying bricks

so ive recently become a fan of dori t's blog. if you decide to become a follower youll quickly notice a recurring theme/obsession with an individual and she goes on and on and on about him and its so damn cute. and i kinda guess that if you read my blog, you'd see that i kinda go on and on about a certain "him" too. but im pulling back. i have the utmost respect for everything he does; he's so focused and driven, and i understand that he is outlandishly busy which is why i dnt nag or whine like some girls would. im more of a "Go Baby" kinda girl, always supportive, there when you need a push, all that jazz. but every now and then you gotta do whats best for you. im fallin back. ive never been one to pursue a dude anyway but im slick feeling like im givin more and thats all bad. so in my best interest im gonna pull out some. "never put all your eggs in one basket" my daddii told me that. i told him "im not a farmer daddii" i see now what he meant tho. im not spreading out my eggs or anything but ima hold onto a few for a late night snack, ya dig? i dnt play games thats why i stopped hooping. and ima keep it 100 (kuz i like hard liquor) he got to me, before i could brace myself and prep my game, he got to me. and i dnt like to feel like im slippin and catchin lil feelings. not when ive convinced myself to never do "this" again. whatever, ima back peddling now. laying new bricks for a secondary wall.
ok honestly, it really hurts my feelings (ugh i sound like such a sissy) but i rarely get sick, and when i do, like have all week, it really ya, hurts my feelings that everyone else is so eager to play doctor (no pun) and buy juice and nyquil but he hasnt. no call. no check-up. and being the rather sensitive woman i am i take it like oh well youre sick get over it call me when youre better. uhm...ouch! over reacting i know but im a girl and i have thin skin sometimes. but everyone has checked in. old flings, lil crushes, even serious relationships have offered any and all remedies. and ive honestly declined them all. the one offer ive been waiting for has yet to be proposed. early birds catch the worm and im feeling like that burnt worm on the sidewalk the ants are having their way with...all bad,
thats neither here nor there kuz i am not reaching out. i figure if he has time or im running across his mind, he'd reach for me. best friend said that being too available just leaves you vulnerable to be hurt. maybe best friend is right. he usually is. so im listening to good advice and hoping he'll prove me wrong. 'til then im watching disney movies and taking nyquil, ill get better but will he call?

untitled

I would like to write some profound, inspiring, enlightening type of blog. like something you would read and be like "damn, that was dope. like I wanta go change the world or save a soul because of maya's amazing blog" well that's not gonna happen because everytime I open this page I wanta say somethin about you-UGH! I'm on my treo, in class wishing I could blog something worth while.
I need a hug.
I'm sick.
I'm tired.
I need a damn hug.

point.blank.period


im so damn sick, ive caught the spenceglover-itis. all bad.

i think my bff should leave his girl, she's not doing him right.
i thought about that midget at thetalent show-giggle giggle.
them girls that got on stage for the big girl vs skinny girls-that was both degrading and nasty as shyt!
best friend, aka reggie, caught my spenceglover-itis. sorry best friend.
dr padgett, my geo teacher, be youtubin' himself for class when he's absent. like forreal guy, do something constructive with your life.
i gave that map test in world history the bizznass this morning.
speaking of "the bizznass"...im wearing out these disney tapes
i hate that everytime i do one of these the first thing that comes to mind is you.
i really dislike educational videos, they make me feel like im 8 again.
i miss my ma. a lot.
i fucked that nyquil up last night!
all this drainage has my tummy hurting.
i want a bagle and strawberry cream cheese something awful.
im in geography writing this and i really hate this class.
its a super hott dude in here tho. lol
im not immediately drawn to light skinned boiz or light washed jeans. i like 'em dark.
-cough-
-sniffle-
we saw lloyd last night. "lloydy, what are you doing here?!" "that nigga got my food!" lmao.
as he left we made a big scene and fake cried, to which lloyd replied "BYE" gotta love him
i cut tha shyt outta my finger last night. thats why i dnt open bottles. where is B.Live when i need him? now im wearing this band-aid like a child watching eduactional videos in a class i hate!
it really...urks (sp?) me that all of my friends called to check on me in my ailment and offer medications and juice, time and hugs, but the one person that's on my mind hasnt...
i need ta stop biting my nails
frankie s. makes me smile. her blog yesterday was a thank you to a few of the ppl in her life that she really values. being one of them means more to me than i can say. i love her.
i saw shannon cohen in the caf last night. i wanta ta smack her ass with a tray. let go, let God.
me and Lei went to get some icecream and this big girl was like "dey got ice cream?! and spwinkles?!!" watch out for the big girls! she was waaaay too excited
i really hate when ppl touch my nose but for some reason when you do it, it doesn't bother me.
its interesting how i write some parts of this as of certain ppl will be reading it
"..." when used properly can be very seductive and eluding...ya dig?
i want it to rain
last night i took two caps of nyquil then i woke up and took another, sippin on that nyquil!
i need new muzik in my, i need new life in my muzik-that was deep.
im gonna learn to play base guitar
i want more tattoos
im bout ta post some music or something, this class is so damn BORING!

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

this is why i love you


so im a strong believer that anyone and everyone is put in your life for a reason to teach you things we have to learn. this one is for Leandria Lott aka LottRoxx aka Mary Jane. this kidd here...man she is so dope i ♥ her something awful

point.blank.period.
her natural hair makes me miss my natural hair
she swims! like baywatch! no homo bruh
we wear pearls!
if we really like you, youll soon be receiving a superhero name and a song
while she makes the vein efforts ta hide her emotions i see straight thru them
"did you almost die?! well im glad you didnt succeed.."

yo...yo...yoyoyo!
"you better...("fill in the blank, yes with whatever)
we have the best inside jokes
me her and frankie s.-we're a treo!
we finish each others lyrics
she co-signs on everything
she puts trail mix in the fridge
and she eats one cracker every time we leave the room
her family is great! good ppl come from good homes. ♥ to the lotts home.
our friendship runs so much deeper than anyone could even know
muzik. 'nough said
oh spenctha! 'nough said
you play thaa thfrench honrth (thfrench hornth thefrench hornth) you so hott spenctha(hott hott)
no nigga!
heavens yes!
llody!!! 'nough said
and all of llody's many songs
like one word is a damn book ta us. once glance speaks volumes between us.
we like different foods tho
in the mornings she can change clothes like literally no bullshyt 7 times but she had clothes picked out last night!
talented. that kidd is talented.
if you dislike her, i dislike you.
oh, 'nough said
"try not ta play me"
"i dnt like nashville water on my hair"
when we see ppl we like we get hella excited
we say hella!
do you even know him?! NO! we do now tho!
we papered your car, both of your cars. my little georgia peach, her little VA boi
"are you going thru something"
she roxx so much in fact she can spell it wrong.
no homo of course, but i slick be missin' her when we're apart for long periods. well anything longer than 20 minutes might constitute long periods.
she ♥ old skool rap! like nigga, i f'in LOVE old skool rap.
"i found b. live! he's right here maya!"
"i dnt have time to laugh at you all day"
if friendship is a two-way street well nigga lets ride!
her advice gets me thru some bad ass days.
we're awesome!
where's dunkyn?
do not touch her hair-trust me.
"ooh ooh ooh dooonnnntttt do me"
and even if we go 2 different greeks we'll still be the same.
i support you. in whatever you do, ill support you.
landria...
music bulding.
"ill pick you up from class"
she speaks in facebook status form
we ♥ band kidd esp our band kidds. and theyre cute so yall can get over that.
"play some music"
"heavy heavy"
name it oscar, name it waldo, just name it!
we talk about ppl in their face
we laugh hysterically at nothing and everything at the same time
"tag me baby!"
"fake bro"
"all pun"
"all bad"

we make the same face in pictures!
"are you ready to talk..."
we come out the bathroom and blurt out the most random of stuff
we wake up and talk to each other mostly because we fell asleep talking to each other so we prolly left off on something that needs ta be caught up
she's way cooler than all of you lame ppl
we color
so i think, oh shyt! we just became best friends.... but honestly guy, thats my homie. and we were sitting in the room and i thought it was time i dedicated one of these to her and all the infinite ways she makes my day. love ya kiddo, love ya lotts! (he he ya get it. kuz her last name is lott and i love ya lotts. man fuck yall, that was funny lol)

like is you forreal?!

so im sitting at the collegiate 100 talent and this midget is standing in the very front on the phone and this fool says "im the front how can you not see me?" uhm....maybe just maybe because you're a midget! im sorry but she walked right into that one. I was rolling...
ill hit yall back later.
xo

ya im on her nuts, her nuts were hott!


aight check it. so i have come to the realization that everyone blogs! im so happy im not the only one pouring my life out to complete strangers. so while i put several ppl on this bandwagon i have also stumbled across my new fav blog: dori t...that shyt is fucking fire! the realest one ive read, honestly. its so her, so honest, so random, so fuckin' funny!

run quick read! its dope, trust. my fav is introducing: the 'rents. so dori t does this thing she calls Ready, Set, Go. well ya ima have ta joc that, sorry dori but that was a hell of a good idea. what you do is type. thats it! lol na but you just write watever comes to mind.

my blogs are always so structured and thought out i wanta be the random, quirky person i really am. so instead of waiting on some major event to chronolize ima just write. thats why i started this anyway, to just write, to just speak my muthafuckin mind, and bitch, ima speaks it! (that was so ghetto)

so im starting a new thing which is really an old thing because dori t already did it but its new to the official mizzmaya blog. im calling it point.blank.period.
here we go...

im sleepy but im wide ass awake.

i have the sudden urge to color.

im very frustrated with my current financial state but i really only wanta work somewhere thats enjoyable and seeing as how im extremely and unnecessarily picky this could take a while.

i have a thing for this guy and he's kinda awaesome. just a lil tho.

i miss aleesa. a lot.

i dnt like a lot of ppl.

im definitely one of the coolest kidds youll ever meet

leandria lott is f'in dope! like if i could hand pick a good friend, she'd look surprisingly just like her!

i used ta play the clarinet, i was most def the shyt. and i most def miss it.

most def is like my fav word.

frankie s...that kidd there, is a whoot! such an individual she almost makes me feel like i conform. not like she crushes my spirits but gives me the desire to really define myself for myself becasue there is nothing more hott than confidence. well except girls that grill and thats only according to b. live....and who believes him?! ;-)

as confident as i appear, i have my insecurities, a lot of insecurities.

i like you. there i said it, dnt bring it up again.

shannon cohen will get her's in the end, im letting it go. holding a grudge is bad for your health. but i really dislike that girl.

if i could i would take 5 showers a day. i find them very calming in a i-just-washed-away-all-yo-bullshyt kinda way.

the cosby's is most def a funny ass show. shouts out ta spencer glover.

lloyd is the best! idk why we all love lloyd but we do. he's one of those emotionless ppl so its rather funny to get excited to see him ad he just waves or releases a bland ass hi. ♥ it.

seeing as how my laptop is dying and im too lazy ta get up and plug it in, ima go ahead and wrap up this blog, its already rather long. so there we go, point.blank.period

♥ you, all of you.

shouts out ta dori t for the new idea! youve been my latest and greatest inspiration.

Monday, September 8, 2008

girl, i heard!


ok, so Ive been doing a lot of muzik posts lately and i think its time i address some things that have been on my mind, nothing major, just some words. 2 parts:

1. dnt judge. i recently linked back up with an old friend. haven't seen this kido in years! and here comes several ppl with all this negative stuff to say about him. there will always be somebody in your ear to bash the next person. trust your instincts, if you feel like your friend means you no good then distance yourself. this goes for most things in life, if you know in your heart its not in your best intentions you gotta let it go. in this case, Ive made up my own mind about dude, we used ta be too kool! know this, ill trust you until you prove to me that everyone was right or that i was wrong and you aint shyt. fool me once, shame on me... it just really bothers me that ppl always have to bring up the bad in ppl. we're human, we all fuck up. and being that most things are open for interpretations and the overwhelming majority werent even there i can honestly say "you think you know well you have no idea."

ill be honest, my life has been TRIP. things have happened to me that i wouldnt dream i would have made it thru but im here, and im happy im here. but it gets on my damn nerves that ppl pass judgement based on anyone's past. im not a thug, being shot doesnt make you gangsta! i would never sincerely say im a thug and if you ask me about my scar ill tell you, it was meant for the dude in front of me. accident. my homeboi, had some green in his car, how many ppl do you kow that ride dirty?! ok! drop it. i dnt smoke and he doesnt put his dirt off on me so why cnt old friends just be friends. why yall gotta trip?! snitchin' ass hoes.

2. reputation is all we have. i know i get upset at ppls pre-conceived notions but really if ppl only know the bad, theyll always keep the bad. we quickly forget that i held every major office in high skool, first chair in top band, extremely smart, very artistic, outstandingly driven, because as soon as some mentions gun shots all heads turn my way. ppl like to see your flaws. i do my best to keep a very good reputation because at the end of the day i cnt fight every rumor and ppl will think what they want to and ppl will believe what they choose to. appear to be at the best of your game at all times, never let 'em catch you slippin and theyll be able to say you fell. things always get blown waaaay outta proportion. so if you get caught riding with a baggies and scales by the time the story gets back ta you, you will have had 20grams of coc' and a pump. my advice, believe a quarter of what you hear and half of what you saw. ppl tell too many lies and from the outside looking in, nothing is as it seems.

those are my 2 pearls of wisdom for the day. be enlightened. stop snitchin'.