you have been warned

of the plethora of advice i have,there is one tidbit that i am finding more and more to really live by. "have no expectations" for once its not me that had to feel the sting of disappointment but rather someone else and all i can tell him...you shouldnt have had these expectations of me.
let me explain. i am not suggesting to lower your standards of ppl at all. i have my stadards, very high standards actally, but i dnt expect the world of ppl. i try not to have ANY expectations of ANYONE. why? because when ppl fuck up, like they always do i dnt have to be so hurt and disappointed. life, in essence, is the continual attempt to reduce the pain and increase the pleasure. will there still be pain? hell ya, you are bound to get your feelings hurt. it happens. but if you realize and accept that he's gon jack it at least once you dnt get your hopes up, you dnt become blinded by his seemingly perfection, you'll keep one foot planted firmly and still leave you heart in the clouds to dream of love. get it?
so what happened Maya? a certain someone was/is feeling me and i did my best to be honet and upfront. i dnt want a relationship, i dnt wanta even get too close. he fell all in like and shyt and now he's feeling hurt when im not becoming what he dreamed of. wake up. from jump i told you wat it is, i hate that youre hurt but i tried to save you. summer allowed for some leisure and some mistakes, i wouldnt change any of it but i think i would have restated some of my rules and regulations. he doesnt mean to but he has some habits and tendencies that rub me the wrong way. how wrong? do this for me...run your hand backwards on a guy's head, yes against his waves (this will only work on a guy with great waves). now run! he's gonna give you the funkiest stank face and even some cuss words to let you know he is appalled! he is disrespected! and you just tried his gangsta! THATS how he rubs me some days. but like i said, he doesnt mean to. but i didnt mean for you to have these outlandish expectations. so who's wrong?
is it Handsome? yes and no. yes Handsome with his hot self and pretty waves he is just awesome! AWESOME! IN EVERY DAMN WAY! lol but he's human, i already know that, and im not getting my hopes up just because he IS human, and he's also a nigga... and while i told him the same thing as P-n-K if some aspects were different i cnt say i wouldnt change my mind. there's always exceptions to the rules...
back to the point...
i realized a while back that P-n-K was a few/several steps ahead of me and i pulled back, grabbed his hand, and i let him know "youre ahead of me. im no where near where you are. if youre trying to take that trip to Boo-dom (say it like Kingdom) im not even in the car yet, i havnt pack, hell i havnt even called out from work. slow your roll, we're friends." now true there may have been some times when things appeared as more than said friendships but hey, im human and i still like to flirt. this is slick how Mr Wonderful got his ass caught up with all these feelings and shyt. no no no honey drop, dnt fall in love, ill leave you where you land. that just goes to show you how cold ive become.
When i see that ppl ahve these ridiculously high expectations of me i drop off completely. while it may not be better to just quit, i think it might just be easier on me to not feel the harshness of failure because i couldnt be what you wanted. i dnt expect these things of you, dnt expect me to ang your moon...
i thought about Mr Man today, random. he was pretty hot too...lol but he had said one time that when youre "talking" to one person there is still entertainment around for your viewing pleasures. example: my fav show is Grey Anatomy (shouts out ta the Bestfriend) so when im watching that im "all in deep/loving it/balls deep" (excuse my french) but then there are all thos commercials, little funny moments that make ya smile and tide you over with samples of pleasure until the show is back. see... Or like movies. all the previews that get you all giddy and excited,a little tease, a slight taste, but you wait all that time for the feature presentation. summer flings are commercials. thank you Mr Man for putting me on game. (call me! lol)

just thought i'd let yall know!
-xoxo-